Thoughts and Guitar Strings
by v-echolls
Summary: Wade Kinsella reflects on his relationship with a certain doctor.   One-shot/AU


It has been a year ago since he first saw her, made out with her in his car and before he knew it, fell in love with her.

Five months since his heart has fluttered so much, leapt in such a pace that he did not think was possible.

"A few more hours", He said to himself as he strummed his guitar slowly, looking out to her now-empty house. "Just a few more and Bluebell would go back to normal. The way it was a year ago, before she arrived."

He chuckled, shaking his head. That would be impossible. She has changed Bluebell in her own way, with those tiny shorts of hers, supposed long legs and irritating yet refreshing personality. He looked over to that house once again, sighing.

She was not exactly his but they had their fair share of bickering, movie nights alongside a few kisses here and there.

"No, no, no." He'd have to repeat the mantra over and over again until he got it through his thick skull.

She was not his. She couldn't be anymore. Not after George Tucker-Bluebell's very own golden boy-had proposed to her just a few weeks ago. He knew she always liked Tucker. A good man in his own right. Successful, even. A lawyer and a god damn good one too.

'Everything I'm not.' He thought bitterly.

One way or another, he knew a part of him would always want-no, crave for her. Crave for her to smile at him the way she always did, crave to hear her laugh at one of his stupid jokes but most of all, he knew he'd always crave to see that twinkle in those big beautiful brown eyes of hers every single time they just finished making love.

Man, he has it bad.

Recalling those long yet seemingly short nights of theirs in his home or at hers, in her office and wherever they could just land themselves at; He knew that out of all the people in Bluebell, he was the one she changed the most. He never felt like this for anybody that eventually left him.

Never felt the sadness engulf him, trap him in own little lonesome world wherein only he and his guitar stayed. He looked at his beauty, the one thing that was always there for him. He chuckled again, remembered how she made a very unnecessary comment of how his little beauty should not be sitting in his room, watching them while they made love.

"Always getting sidetracked there". He thought again.

Just the bare thought of her...

Oh God. It has only been a few hours and he already misses her warm body against his, her mouth warming him up. She knew just how to tease him, make him want more and made him so uncharacteristically want to drag her back to bed every time she made a move to leave.

It was only an agreement for her though. Back when none of their relationships have been working out, hers with Judson and his with everyone else, they both agreed whenever either one was needing some warmth for the night, they would shoulder them.

Until the day George Tucker came to his senses and asked her out. They have been going at it a few months already, feeling no need for Lavon's company anymore since he started to date Lemon. Yet, here comes Tucker in his mighty glory; freshly-washed blue polo and Italian leather shoes, approaching her, sitting beside her at one of the stools in the Rammer Jammer, right in front of Wade of all places. With that pesky smile of his, he asked her. Right there and then, she accepted without a moment's hesitation.

Wade loved how things had turned out for him back then. He'd get to always be with her, trying to show her his love and wait for her to return or at least see how he felt. It has already been five months and she has not.

Sure, Tucker had his share of experiencing her in bed but Wade always thought-more like knew-he was the one to bring the inner animal, the inner sex-crazed doctor person she truly is. Their relationship had been strained to say the least. He was losing her, trying to hold on to the very thin rope of his relationship with her. She, on the other hand, was playing between Tucker and him. He knew she was lost, did not know whether she should hold on to someone like her or someone she was suppose to detest. He saw it in her eyes when he made love to her last night. He saw it when she accepted Tucker's out of the blue proposal at the Rammer Jammer. He just knew.

What he was not certain of though, was how she was able to whip both Tucker and him. He was not certain how she managed to be in two relationships at the same time. Then again, she was no longer an active participant in theirs once she and Tucker got serious.

Yet, he could not help himself but believe his and her relationship was more serious and exciting. Mostly due to the fact he knocked on her home last night, pleaded to her with his eyes, mouth, and body. He did not want her to leave and last night was his last chance to show her how he felt.

Morning after, there was no twinkle in her eye, no remark, no laugh. Not even the hint of a smile. She looked at him in such a way he did not think she was capable of looking. She looked at him with such detest, it made him shiver. Told him to leave, never speak of last night's events to anyone especially George and to never look for her in New York.

That was when he was truly hopeless. That was when he felt everything he tried to do for her had gone to waste and how he would never be able to be the man he was for her. For the first time in years, Wade felt loss.

Snapping himself back to reality, he watched from afar as Lavon and Lemon strode back to their house with sly smiles.

"Just like two teenagers in high school" he thought. "But in love."

He went back to strumming his guitar, hearing a plane fly above. Her plane. The one she was on, taking her back to New York City where Tucker and her would start their new life together.

Oh, how he hated Bluebell. Now, everything he sees would remind him of her. The doctor from New York who invaded his mind, body and soul. Yet he could not fault her. Such sweet pain.

Zoe Hart, the name that still makes his heart flutter like mad. She was the one who got away.

**AN: **_I suck at writing and all but I hope you guys would be kind enough to review or help me so I have something to improve on! This is actually my first story on here so yeah. :}_


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